What is “Redamancy”?
To be honest, I can’t even read this word correctly but who cares? It’s not easy to give a clear definition of the word, the cleanest way I could put it is if you have redamancy you’re the happiest person alive.
Everybody wants to love, so we give and give and give. Behind every “I love you” is a question lingering in the receiver’s mind doubting the sincerity. I have said it a thousand times without feeling it. Funny how it came back and hit me in the neck… worst pain ever. So I made a promise to myself, I swore not to say it if I didn’t mean it. Even if I did, I shall make myself, no… force myself to feel that way.
Love was supposed to be… beautiful, not like this. I have people said it to me without meaning it, and I thought it was true. If you love someone, and they love you back, then you have gotten redamancy.
This Chapter is named “Redamancy.” not because I’m finding love from another person, but myself. I have never actually love myself, and it’s hard to love someone when you don’t give yourself enough love. I used to say: “I hate myself, but you can love me instead.”
I grew out of it because nobody alive can ever give you the love you deserve, and what you need isn’t self-pity, it’s self-love. So give yourself some redamancy, as I’m trying to.